You really, really hate the idea of revealing anything about yourself, don't you? You aren't the only sadist I know who likes kink because it provides a clear, laid out, set of rules that make him feel more in control and more safe.

[ He's got the tastes of an alien and a guy who spent too long in space and is going to be hedonistic about it now. Plain black coffee is a thing he is over. ]

HE's right. It does.